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Indian border with China to be fenced with nimbu mirchi

New Delhi. After expressing regret, disappointment and heartbreak over China’s objection, outrage and warning on Prime Minister Manmohan Singh’s visit to Arunachal Pradesh, India has finally decided to secure its border with China by fencing it with nimbu-mirchi (lemon and chili). Nimbu-mirchi is a popular and reliable tool among Indians for warding off evil forces from attacking them. The decision has drawn mixed reactions from various quarters.

“I don’t believe in black magic. I see it as a security step while you call it superstition. Just like I go to a poor man’s house and you call it a dalit’s house.” Congress leader Rahul Gandhi justified the move of the government, saying it was a befitting reply to the nonsensical uttering of China.

Such tools will be deployed along the border with China to protect us from the enemy

Such tools will be deployed along the border with China to protect us from the enemy

BJP has surprisingly welcomed the decision as it believes that the step will secure the Indian territory from the evil eyes of the Chinese, but has criticized the government of doing ‘too little too late’. The party has demanded that black  worn out shoes should also be hung from the barbed wires along with a board with the message “buri nazar wale tera munh kala” (o ye man with the evil eyes, let your face be black) written in Chinese on it. But Congress has rejected the suggestion saying it can jeopardize India’s relationship with the African countries.

Defense experts have by and large welcomed the step calling it a welcome change from the usual ‘appeasement policy’ followed by India in the bilateral relations, but have cautioned that China could very well ‘misuse’ and ‘misappropriate’ the tools employed by India.

“We must make sure that they don’t run away with the lemon and chilies to make hakka noodles or chili chicken. We have intelligence reports that Chinese are actually looking forward to the fencing of the border and ready to replace our lemon and chilies with Chinese ones, which are of quite inferior quality and may not work as intended.” Vishnu Bellani, a defense expert cautioned.

Meanwhile China has again expressed deep anguish and objection over these reports and has accused India of fomenting trouble along with the disputed borders by indulging in such acts. China has especially warned of dire consequences if Shimla Mirch (capsicum) was used for fencing the borders. It should be noted that Dalai Lama resides in Dharamsala, which is very near to Shimla in the hitherto undisputed Indian state of Himachal Pradesh.

Common citizens of India have expressed hope over the development and are praying that peace prevails in the region, but they also fear that there could be a scam in the mass sourcing of the lemons and chilies in coming days, pushing the prices of goods, especially the food prices, further up. Many people have already started hoarding nimbu-mirchi.

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Reported by on Oct 14th, 2009 and filed under Politics. You can follow any responses to this report through the RSS 2.0. You can leave a response or trackback to this report



20 Responses for “Indian border with China to be fenced with nimbu mirchi”

  1. [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Nakul Shenoy and Vineet, Faking News. Faking News said: Breaking News: Indian border with China to be fenced with nimbu mirchi http://bit.ly/1xqxxO #fakingnews [...]

  2. Varun says:

    Man….you have the wickedest headlines this side of Pharaohs!

  3. Ravi G says:

    Heard, after reading this, that China has just finalized a huge order to export Lemons and Chillies to India. They see this as potential opportunity to boost sales of their agricultural products.

  4. We must make sure that they don’t run away with the lemon and chilies to make hakka noodles or chili chicken.

    hahahaha!!

  5. shikari says:

    very well said sirji….

    especially the lines mentioning about african countries and the exchange fo nimbu and mirchi

  6. Rathin says:

    “it can jeopardize India’s relationship with the African countries” ……..” they don’t run away with the lemon and chilies to make hakka noodles or chili chicken ”

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA … cant stop laughing …

  7. saanchi says:

    This should have been done long time ago …. also some yagya’s by some of the most prestigious pundits shuld be held at the border itself to promote peace … :D

  8. martes says:

    To counter possibilities of Chinese dumping their nimbius and mirchis, the Indian agricultural ministry has cut a deal with Monsanto to supply genetically modified nimbus and mirchis; this has angered huge swathes of farmers. The Krishi Raksh Sangh, an NGO has denounced the Indian ministry’s decision as a threat to india’s biodiversity of mirchis and nimbus, with fears of GM pollution, IMF loans and farmer suicides. meanwhile the chinese have already started growing mirch and nimbu in the tropical climate of the northeast, as aid packages to local farmers.

  9. Rishi says:

    China has especially warned of dire consequences if Shimla Mirch (capsicum) was used for fencing the borders. It should be noted that Dalai Lama resides in Dharamsala, which is very near to Shimla

    awesome!!!!!!!!!!

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