Reported by Madurai. Addressing a group of firemen and volunteers at a public meeting here, Home Minister P Chidambaram issued a strongly worded statement warning the recklessly raging fire at Jaipur IOC (Indian Oil Corporation) depot of dire consequences if it didn’t die down all by itself in the next two days. Fire and smoke has been shamelessly billowing out of the IOC depot at Jaipur for the last four days even as the government has showed commendable tolerance and patience and had not done anything at all.
“We prefer to settle problems through consensual dialogues rather than corrective actions. But let the fire not take this as a sign of our indifference or incompetence, we are capable of taking on any threat and give a crushing response to any party.” Chidambaram asserted the government position and issued a 48-hour deadline for the fire to extinguish itself, failing which the government might be pushed to take some actions against the shameless flames.
Shameless fire mocking a magnanimous administration
Home Minister was full of praise for the IOC officials for showing admirable restraint at the time of such an unseen crisis. Apparently an ugly leakage of oil had preceded the fire at the depot, but officials kept their cool and didn’t panic to take any action even as the locals bugged them to do something. Minister announced that the depot managers and person in charge would be transferred to better cities as a reward. He likened the efforts of the officials with those in Australia who have been fighting bushfires for ages.
“Australians have a long history of being patient and persistent with bushfires, even though they are just the opposite with their rivals on cricket grounds. With the efforts of IOC officials and the local administration, now India can claim to be next to Australia in fire fighting mechanisms. We might as well beat them to gain the number one status.” Chidambaram expressed hope.
Despite these stern warnings and expressions of hope, the fire at the IOC depot in Jaipur showed no signs of relenting when reports last came in. Experts believe that the fire is calling the government’s bluff.
“Fire has been an integral part of the Indian polity as far as I know. None of the Indian leaders are capable of dousing any fire, but they are capable of igniting new ones. And when you ask them for solutions, they would say – we didn’t start the fire, it was always burning. Isn’t it? Fire has seen all this and it understands the psyche of your leaders very well. It knows that these warning don’t mean anything.” Billy Joel, a global expert on fires told Faking News.
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[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Faking News, Nayan Medhi. Nayan Medhi said: Government issues final warning to raging fire at Jaipur IOC depot: Addressing a group of firemen and volunteer.. http://bit.ly/1DrZk1 [...]
kekekekeke.
Guess How Much Insurance IOC Will Claim ?
Psssst……WAS THIS ALL DONE TO CLAIM?
haha … ” we didn’t start the fire……….. ” gud use of the song and the singer …
Simply Awesone. You guys are beating onion!
love the bit where you’re linking to another article on NDTV
kudos!
I have become fan of the author of this article…He not only uses the script used by media but also used loads of G.K. into it…The song
we didn’t start the fire, it was always burning. was used in a very apt way.
lol…this 1 is too gud… I study @ 1 of the colleges @ sitapura where this blast/fire thingy happened. At that time when blast occurred i never thought i would be reading of it as a JOKE!!!…But this makes me laugh seriously!!!..KEEP THE GOOD WORK COMING!!!
Hats off to you pagal patrakar.. this article hit the nail on the head.. we have been turning a blind eye towards pak sponsored terrorism. The metaphour used here is very suitable as both the fire and terrorism cause irreparable damage. Its a pity how chidambandaram tries to address pakistan.. It is more of a self imposed mask of righteousness which is worthless in the face of clear and present danger from pakistan and china.. in contrast he just sits in the office with his dhoti up and talks bullshit.. all smoke and no fire..
similar to http://www.theonion.com/content/video/obama_to_enter_diplomatic_talks