Angelina Jolie “When Brad bores me, I turn to Faking News”
Brad Pitt “I read Faking News to keep Angelina happy”
JMM President Shibu Soren today announced a lucrative bidding process for the sale of newly elected JMM MLAs after conclusion of the State Assembly Elections on Wednesday. With the Congress and BJP camps both hung at 25 and 20 seats respectively, both the parties have welcomed this idea of Mr. Soren, and have hailed it as the beginning of a new era of transparency in public life.
An investigation by Faking News has revealed that ex-DGP of Haryana SPS Rathore, who molested 14-year-old Ruchika Girhotra in 1990 and was released on bail this Monday after being found guilty, is suffering from Small Penis Syndrome, also known as “penis envy”, where a person nurses a chronic anxiety of having a small penis. This disorder has repeatedly forced Rathore to undertake unhealthy practices to boost his low self-esteem.
Faking News Intelligence Group (FNIG), the research and analysis wing of Faking News, has come up with an electoral reform proposal that might just make the compulsory voting lucrative for common citizens, especially the poor. FNIG has submitted its report to the leading electoral reform activist Narendra Modi, which recommends paying money to all such Indian citizens who turn up to vote in any election.
“I am being targeted because I am a joker.” This accusation by tainted IAS officer Vidushak Varma was enough to get all the jokers of India rally behind him in support. Varma, who is a secretary in the road construction department and works voluntarily as a part-time joker for Ajanta Circus, has been accused of siphoning off 2.38 crore rupees from the national highway development fund.
Now each one can fly. No, that’s not a new slogan from some plane ticket booking website, but a promise by the reputed Tata Group, which has announced their latest plans to launch Nana – the people’s helicopter. Nana will cost around 10 Lakh rupees and will be specially manufactured for the Indian middle class that desires to have safer and quicker means of transport at an affordable cost.
Another week full of happenings; aren’t we blessed to be born as Indians? The week saw Mumbai terror attacks accused Kasab retracting all his earlier statements and claiming innocence. When he was first caught by the police last year, apparently he had wished to be killed. One year changes a lot. Yeah, one year changes a lot; even Advani and Lalu Yadav felt so this week.
Researchers and genetic engineers at MTV have claimed to have decoded human genes that make a person downright dumb and a terrible jackass. After around thirteen years of extensive research taken up in India, the MTV scientists are now confident of raising a thoroughbred dumb generation, which they are planning to term as Gen-Du, with the Gen being pronounced as Jhan (not Gun) and Du being pronounced as Do (as in Do the Dew).
After launching Kingfisher Calendar 2010, Chairman of the United Breweries Group and Kingfisher Airlines Vijay Mallya has taken another great step to help India shine on the global stage by agreeing to strip for the inaugural Indian edition of Playboy, the famous men’s magazine founded by Hugh Hefner. The magazine would hit the stands early next year allowing Mallya’s fans to find intimate details about the business tycoon.
Anjeer Reddy, the national president of a little known regional party called Disha Bhramit Rajyam, has announced his plans to go on an indefinite fast over the issue of separate statehood for Telangana. Mr. Reddy has stopped taking food from this morning and aims to continue doing so till all his demands are met by the government, but nobody yet knows what his demands are; even Mr. Reddy declined to divulge.
Attempts to educate Delhi residents into behaving like global citizens received a stinking setback when Delhi Metro officials caught a man defecating on the tracks near the Pragati Maidan station. It’s not yet clear how the man, 25-year-old Anal Azad, climbed onto the 50-feet high tracks to attend to the nature’s call. Although Anal has been apprehended, Metro officials are unsure what to do next.
Miss Kiran Dixit in front car: Oye Khote Suttinder…tu aunty kisko kehta hai. Gaddi te...
Uti: One of the most hilarious articles i’ve ever read in FN..best was “what...
abcd: lol
himanshu: i am ready to take this challenge, call me or mail me.
Jayson Ardoin: I’m developing a site site and I was thinking of changing the...
Paranoid youth(cat percentile:22): I want to think beyond the IIMs. :S
Damodar Bale: Heads off to you,Sirjee…
Google doodle when Sachin scores his 100th international century
After Bigg Boss, Swami Agnivesh gets ready for MTV Roadies
Angry Birds say no to crackers, celebrate green Diwali by blasting pigs
P Chidambaram vs. Pranab Mukherjee – the boxing match
UPA releases its own poster of the movie “A Wednesday”
Mayawati bans “That Girl In Yellow Boots” after WikiLeaks exposé
BCCI releases official poster of the injurious tour of England