It’s widely believed that whenever he gets a letter, Lalit Modi reads between the lines
Dear Lalit,
Dude, stop gawking at that girl, and concentrate on this letter.
That’s better.
At the outset I want to make it clear that I am not your fan, not even on facebook. In fact, starting today, facebook tried to make things easier by removing the concept of being a fan; now they just ask you to like something. Nice step, but too late, now I don’t even like you.
Why? Because Shashi Tharoor had to resign after you tweeted about Sunanda Pushkar. I don’t care man whether he was right or wrong, but you were completely wrong with your timing. Barely a week had passed since Shashi Tharoor started following Faking News on twitter, and now he’s jobless.
Do you realize that India TV could invite some taantrik and analyze the kundli of Faking News to find out if this was the reason Tharoor lost his job? They can very easily declare Faking News as manhoos (sinister and inauspicious) as it was born (founded) on a day Lehman Brothers went bankrupt. And this could cause Gul Panag to feel jittery as she was next to follow Faking News on twitter.
Seriously, what were you thinking when you tweeted that? Were you high on cocaine or has success got into your head?
Success? What success? What did you risk to get it? If IPL was a flop show, it wouldn’t have cost you a rupee. SRK, Mallya, Ambani and others would have got poorer, and of course BCCI that runs on public money would have got poorer, which means the tax payers were taking the risk, not you. You were just getting richer, as the Income Tax department has been saying for over six months now.
And don’t tell me that IPL was your brainchild; you just changed one word of ICL and applied the business model of EPL. If IPL is your brainchild, I’m the father of fake news reporting.
In fact, I feel so sorry for Subhash Chandra, look what you have done:
ICL (Indian Cricket League) – IPL (Indian Premier League)
Mumbai Champs – Mumbai Indians
Chennai Superstars – Chennai Super Kings
Chandigarh Lions – Kings XI Punjab (with lions in their logo)
Royal Bengal Tigers – Kolkata Knight Riders (hmmm…)
Hyderabad Heroes – Deccan Chargers (full marks for this)
Delhi Giants – Delhi Daredevils
Ahmedabad Rockets – oh fuck, this Tharoor guy spoiled the fun
I seriously don’t understand why could Shashi Tharoor not see this and had to go crazy about a Kochi team, could he not have waited for another year?
Anyway, he had to resign for his love, but I hear that you too could be asked to resign. LOL!
Okay, sorry! But before you go, could you blow the lid completely off this drama called IPL? I promise that I’d like you on facebook for this.
You know, people are talking all kinds of things about IPL. This makes me feel so guilty after watching an IPL match, just like I feel guilty after watching porn. I might have watched it for momentary pleasure, but indirectly I could be guilty of helping human trafficking and forced prostitution. Easy, I meant watching porn, what were you thinking?
So please tell us the truth before you go. And don’t tell us any cock-and-bull story like you claimed that someone had hacked your twitter account. Come on, were you not trying your AdultFriendFinder password on twitter before you suddenly realized the mistake? This is human, accept and move on.
And yeah, don’t worry if you lose your job, Vishal Bhardwaj is planning a sequel to Kaminey, and he might drop Shahid Kapoor and pick you for the role. Fuper! Fahi ja rahe ho doft!
Yours truly,
Pagal Patrakar (PP).
(by the way, my friend Khamba too wrote a letter to you and wanted me to deliver it to you, but I thought you may not like it, if you have time, maybe you could check it out here)
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- An open letter to Shoaib Malik (hope this one is delivered)
- An open letter to Nitish Kumar from a non resident Bihari
Nothing will happen to Modi and he ain’t going anywhere. Maybe hibernation for a while, at worst.
We have all heard tons of allegations but where is the proof? Has anyone seen a shred of proof – e mail trails, phone intercepts, bank transactions, bid documents, anything at all? Has the GoI admitted that it has any proof at all? All news are attributed to sources and the sources will disappear faster than you can say LalitKumarModiyousonofabitchwhyshouldyouhaveallthefunwhileIspendmylifejerkingoff.
Media in India is governed by chutiya’s. I propose Pagal for I&B Minister.
wow awesome article!!
modi is a born fraud-marrying his mother’s friend,cocaine in college,kissing nd donno what more wid poor cheerleaders,RCA chairman by identity theft(case still on).He certainly deserves to go to jail for hosting a platform for so many criminals to come on 1 stage nd convert black money to white money withoput even paying taxes.
Atleast this stupid tax waiver shud be lifted off IPL nd BCCI nd stop cricket from complete destriction
“poor cheerleader”,,,,,hehe
This is a laughter riot… absolutely hilarious
Open a new ‘PP/Khamba’ profile on Facebook and check out the number of fans you guys will garner within the first week 
)))
Modi’s going no where…..hes just gonna disappear like Dalmia ( yeah, remember him!!!)
Theirs always an escape route for the rich in India and if your the highest tax payer it shouldn’t be much of a problem.
Pagal should be give Nobel puraskar… doston awaz uthaoo..isko nobel dilao
I think it is right to say that Lalit Modi is the typcial spoilt brat of rich Indians.
I also think Lalit Modi didnt do anything to make IPL a big hit.
Cricket is itself a biggest hit in India. Indians lap everything that is cricket. With icons such as Sachin Tendulkar and Kapil Dev appearing in Indian cricket it is possible that any child born in India becomes a cricket fan first before starting to admire its parents.
I fully sympathise with Subhash Chandra, who was the pioneer in bringing this form of cricket to India. If not for ICL, IPL wouldnt have been born. And to say that Lalit Modi did all the hard work is just cheap crap!
Yeah, Lalit Modi is a spoilt brat.
Look at the way he landed in a Helicopter in the middle of the ground.
He thinks he is rich (look at Mukesh Ambani looking simple in his shirt and cheering his team)
Lalit Modi should be paraded naked along the streets in India and stone pelted for what he has done to the game of Cricket in India.
Cheat and brat!
And now, how about an open letter to Sharad Pawar, Praful Patel, Gavaskar, Pataudi or even Rajiv Shukla?
Have guts?
At least, Modi “created” something that most politicians, media and faking news people can only dream to.
Brat or a cheat — only time will prove — it is too pre-mature to judge him and declare him “guilty”, even before any evidence surfaces or Modi has a chance to present his side of the story.
It is too convenient and lazy.
even DAWOOD IBRAHIM “created” something you asshole, and he created a bigger empire that employs more people, so?
basically you are either an asshole or Lalit Modi himself commenting, in either case, you are the same guy
How about daring to write an open letter to UPA govt, MMS and Soniaji for garnering support from Mulayam, Lalloo, Soren and Mayawati by using CBI to arm-twist them for defeating the cut-motion in the parliament?