Mumbai. A 30-year-old bhaiyya was detained here by alert MNS (Medical Notification Sena) workers on suspicion of spreading Malaria in the city. Santosh Kumar, a taxi-driver by profession, was seen coughing profusely and shadily loitering around a government hospital when the MNS workers laid siege over him. An undisclosed number, rumored to be running into millions, of plasmodium falciparum parasites were recovered from Santosh, who is still pleading innocent.

“Yes, traces of Malaria parasite have been found in his possession and we are investigating the matter further. We suspect it an act of illegal parasite trafficking.” said Dr. Raj Thackeray, an honorary physician and hardcore surgeon of Marathi Asmita Chikitsalay, who immediately referred the suspect to ICU (Immigrant Culling Unit) as soon as MNS workers brought Santosh to him.

Dr. Raj Thackeray showing one of the causes of Malaria

Dr. Thackeray had earlier alerted MNS workers to keep a tab on filthy and feverish bhaiyyas, whom he suspected to be spreading Malaria and Dengue in the city, following which MNS workers have been scanning the city looking for bhaiyyas with symptoms of Malaria.

“This guy was shivering under a blanket and coughing outside KEM Hospital when we caught the bastard.” informed Shishir Shinde, a local head of MNS, further informing that Santosh had tried to run away when he saw the alert MNS workers.

On his part, Santosh has denied any malafide intentions to spread Malaria in the city, though he agreed that he was pussyfooting outside the KEM Hospital when he was arrested by the MNS workers for appearing shady.

“I was not sure if I should get inside and how much will it cost me. I didn’t want to squander away the money that I had saved to send it to my family back in Champaran.” Santosh said, minutes before he was taken to the ICU.

Meanwhile editors at Wikipedia have complained that they witnessed vandalism from Mumbai IP addresses for the wiki entry on Malaria, with many users adding “Biharis” and “Bhaiyyas” under the “Causes” subtopic for the entry. At least a dozen IP addresses were banned till reports last came in.

MNS workers have denied any hand in this vandalism.

“We don’t indulge in online vandalism. Offline world gives us enough opportunity.” said Shishir Shinde, who also suspected the bhaiyyas of planning to spread plague in Mumbai after he spotted a few mice in the slums inhabited by migrants.

“Rats! They need to be culled.” he added.

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