New Delhi. Under pressure to recover costs and attract sponsorships, the Organizing Committee of the Commonwealth Games has decided to sell the event tickets in black to generate revenues many times higher than originally targeted. The decision was taken after the official merchandiser of the games pulled out a few days back, dousing all hopes of generating revenues from planned sales of stuffed Shera and Qutub Minar saucers.
“We were left with no other choice.” Suresh Kalmadi, the evergreen and everlasting chairman of the Organizing Committee said, justifying the decision.
The announcement has caused a flurry amongst the media and eminent personalities who feel their jobs are now in danger. Suhel Seth, Manish Tewary, Kirti Azad and Mani Shankar Aiyar were especially upset and feeling unwell as per trusted sources.

Delhi Chief Minister Sheila Dixit also gave thumbs-up to the latest plan by the CWG Organizing Committee
“If these announcements of corruption are made in such an open manner by the organizing committee themselves, then what will we discuss, uncover and break?” said a senior media personality on condition of anonymity.
According to anonymous reporters, Arnab Goswami of Times Now had finalized thirty-nine questions and thirteen panelists for his prime-time show Newshour tonight to discuss this ‘institutionalizing of corruption’, while Sagarika Ghose of CNN-IBN had already tweeted seven tweets attracting vital and well-researched data for her own prime-time show.
Such acts have further emboldened Suresh Kalmadi, who argued, “Our only objective is to earn as much money as we can before this golden opportunity passes. People like Arnab Goswami and Sagarika Ghose have been earning money at our expense all along. This cannot be allowed. Unless we are given a percentage of the money earned by these news channels, we will keep on being honest about our dishonesty.”
It is not yet known what will happen to those tickets that have already been bought, but experts are of the view that these would be bought back at 100 times the original price to be distributed among the families of government officials to make them feel 100 times more special and valued.
In other news, Warren Anderson (Ex – CEO of Union Carbide) is now friends with Suresh Kalmadi on facebook. They have co created the group called Clean Getaways.
(the reporter tweets here)
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Reported by Manik Mahna on Aug 17th, 2010 and filed under Assorted. You can follow any responses to this report through the RSS 2.0. You can leave a response or trackback to this report





This is satire at it very best!
Liked the part that suggests News channels should pay royalty to OC for all the news of corruption!
Good thought

Excellent article. I am sure those who try to buy tickets in ” white” will be severely punished- by having to clean up the CWG debris.
wonderful satire.. everything perfectly fitting in today’s context. The news channels generating money because of the corrupt politicians and getting disturbed if their scope of breaking and discovering news going down, all these are perfect satires.
Good job pagle.
“According to anonymous reporters” … too good. ROFL.
LOL
Breaking news : Warren Anderson has been hired as a “security expert” to proactively prevent any chemical leaks in Delhi during the games.
kalmadi and anderson friends on facebook lol
Excellent dude. Keep up the work. Politicians ruined our country.
Lolz.
Thnx to kalmadi, W Anderson’s issue is swept under the carpet..no wonder they r frnds on FB
This article suggests some of the measures that kalmadi should take to save his ass!!
hellisnext.blogspot.com/2010/08/kalmadi-ki-gandmari.html