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Guest Patrakar
http://www.fakingnews.com
Keeping in mind the absurd performance by their respective teams, cricket officials from India, Sri Lanka, Pakistan, and Bangladesh have decided upon having one team from the sub-continent going by the name “East Indies”. The team will consist of the best players from all the four nations, to give the Ausssies and the Proteas and the English a run for their money in the test-matches.
With rupee weakening against the US dollar, NRIs are suddenly back in demand for everyone – relatives, shopkeepers, real estate companies, and beggars. With every dollar fetching more benefits of an aam aadmi amidst rising inflation, Indians are back to giving importance to NRIs. However, there is a downside too for the NRIs back in the US, where they have been denied salary hikes.
In keeping with the trend of reversing and scrapping the schemes and decisions of the previous DMK regime, Tamil Nadu CM Jayalalithaa has announced that all the marriages that took place during the DMK rule will be “null and void”. The decision has attracted angry responses from DMK and some other organizations, but many men are reportedly joyous and are looking forward to the day when the order is implemented.
Shahrukh Khan had already roped in Rajinikanth and Amitabh Bachchan for Ra.one promotions and had plans to rope in Sachin Tendulkar, but chain of events led to Rahul Dravid being offered the role. Dravid will play the role of a robot called Chinni, who will fight with Chitti, the robot played by superstar Rajinikanth. This is expected to make Ra.One, which releases around Diwali, a superhit.
After weeks of bickering, ruling Congress and opposition BJP have come together and announced a step that they believe would make things better for aam aadmi. Both parties have decided to change the country’s name from “India” to “Inddia”. The new name is expected to bring a new boost to the economy, and help get rid of the bad spirits that have been troubling the country.
In an exciting development, a group of IIT Madras PhD students have been given permission to study the possibility of a revolutionary fuel. The fuel being talked about here is a mixture of tobacco and tea, which has helped hundreds of engineering students survive on the campus without any apparent intake of regular meals. The fuel, if successfully developed, will solve India’s energy problems by 2020.
Tihar Jail Prisoner Welfare Committee has received an email request from Speak Asia Online Private Limited for encouraging prisoners to sign-up for their online surveys. The mail carries an interesting proposal where scam tainted leaders lodged in Tihar would be given free primary membership. The leaders will then encourage others to sign up for the surveys, thus improving their own chances of earning huge commissions.
Kollywood actor Joseph Vijay Chandrasekhar, who is known to remake hit movies of other languages, especially Telugu, in Tamil, has decided to allocate a substantial part of his earnings to sponsor research program at IIT Madras to build a time machine. Vijay hopes to go to the future, watch all hit movies that are not yet released, come back to the present time, and remake them.
IT major Tata Consultancy Services plans to hire 37,000 professionals for its domestic and overseas markets through campus auctions in the next fiscal. But the auctions will not have TCS bidding for bright freshers, but the freshers bidding for dull jobs. Each round of bidding will see 50 freshers coming together, and whoever quotes the lowest salary demand will get a job contract from TCS.
After a reader of Faking News pointed out the possible “inspiration” behind Airtel’s new logo, our investigative journalism team decided to dig further into the issue. After a month long investigation, our team has concluded that there was more to it than what meets our eyes. There clearly seems a hidden message in all the logos that appear inspired from the posteriors of various living beings.
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