Mumbai. Leading Shaving Supplies and Personal Care Products Company, 9 o’clock, today announced a new product targeting beauty salon market in India – half blades. The decision was taken during the company’s quarterly product review meeting, the spokesperson told Faking News.
“We have always focused to make products for end users. To put it in black and white, we always make ready-to-use products that can be used directly out of the box/container/wrapper – whether the customer is ready to use them or not!”
“For years, the salons in India are breaking our product into half, every alternate time they have to use; this kind of alternate anything – leave alone alternate breaking – has been proven to be totally laughable in India even though some believe finally alternate or alternate to alternate will work! We are digressing here…Just add this! Doing a break-up to clean up a long grown mess has been the way of life worldwide, for centuries.”
“Anyway, we assume this new product, a half blade, will be a start for several revolutionary products/titles in Indian corporate. Soon there will be best selling books printed on toilet paper; pencils with ear buds attached at one end; soft drinks openly advertised as pesticides; schools and colleges having chief executive officers instead of principals etc.,” the spokesperson finished his monologue in a typical business style.
The reporter from Faking News, ever a sports and political enthusiast, could think of a few more to this new revolutionary product line, on the way back from the corporate chit chat, ‘The politicians in India will rebrand themselves as clowns, stand-up comedians and freestyle wrestlers/boxers. Cricket players will rebrand themselves as politicians, with almost every idiosyncrasy and skills that are required, including corruption, have already been acquired. A premier league will rebrand itself as Indian Entertainment League to openly play and stage fixed matches.’