Mumbai. A middle aged and middle classed man, hysterically laughed at seeing a pen protected with a string attached in the teller counter, was later denied a loan at Punjab national bank, Andheri branch. The incident happened just before the Holi celebrations in the city, it is learnt by Faking News.
“Loans are dispersed to the rich and famous with no strings attached whatsoever. But the banks try to stop customers from stealing a pen and protect that by attaching a string. This is hilarious. What is even more hilarious is it is a Rotomac. Perhaps the bank can protect ownership of a Rotomac pen; who will protect the banks from the owners of the pen company” the middle class man smiled broadly with an unusual sense of humour despite having the loan been rejected by the bank.
“We are accused of taking bribes from the jewellery owner, a few necklaces and diamond jewelleries. Totally baseless charges by CBI. Did we take Rotomac pens too as bribes? It is silly, really. On this other silly remarks about us protecting a ballpoint pen with a string is not to stop the customers from stealing it. It is for the customers to find a pen easily while filling the forms” a PNB official, who recently won the prestigious award for ‘most vigilant of all’, told Faking News.
“We always care for the customers. We protect customers from losing money. We send ‘bank never calls for asking OTP’ messages and advise them not to share their pin numbers with anyone. After some fake news about our bank losing 1000s of crores in loans, a few customers have sent ‘bank never cares for public money’ messages to us. The fact is that we have made much more by charging our home loan and vehicle loan customers. This money is just a fraction of our profits” he further added on the recent breaking news on the illegal loan sanctions from the bank.
Meanwhile, on hearing about a middle aged and middle classed man looking for a loan, as many as 150 loan telemarketers have called him during the Holi celebrations, it is learnt by faking news. ‘This is worse than Holi hooliganism’ the man murmured to himself, when faking news took leave from the area not traced by the loan mongers yet.