Saturday, 11th April, 2020


Man, who invested in stocks to buy a luxury car, settles for a second hand bike

17, Aug 2013 By Mishtik Journo

Mumbai. “I was about to buy an Alto car in 2010 with the two and a half lakh rupees I had saved, when this dream merchant Raj Kapoor sold the idea to me to invest in equities and buying a Honda City within two years by tripling my money,” Nivesh – a young man confided to the psychiatrist when he was brought to the clinic this morning.

Raj Kapoor is a relationship manager with a stock broking firm who managed Nivesh’s equity investments in the last three years.

It was sometime in April 2010, when Sensex reached 18000 after having fallen to the 8000 level in March 2009, when Raj Kapoor came to Nivesh and claimed that the upward trend will continue at least for the next two years.

“Not sure if it was the first day of April,” Nivesh recalled, “But I was impressed with all the graphs he showed and I decided to wait for a couple of years and convert my Alto into a Honda City.”

Stock Market
Nivesh tried to control his thoughts and emotions, but they overwhelmed him.

“But how did you lose money when Sensex is at the same level where it was in 2010?” asked the shabbily dressed psychiatrist who also dabbled in the markets.

“All these indices! They are opium of the masses. My shares are down by 80% and this Sensex remains at the same level!” Nivesh said tearfully, “I haven’t eaten daal tadka garnished with fried onions or Bhindi do pyaza in last two months, leave aside Tandoori Chicken! These indices are made to fool the public.”

“The final blow came yesterday when the Sensex crashed by over 700 points. Nivesh called up Raj Kapoor and told him to sell off all his shares as he couldn’t keep up with any more nonsense. He got 42000 rupees in his account, and he bought a second hand Hero motorcycle for his family of seven,” Nivesh’s friend Nipun told Faking News outside the clinic.

“This morning, he spent half an hour looking for the AC button on his second hand bike. We tried to tell him that it was a bike not a luxury car, but he refused to listen. That’s when we had to bring him here,” Nipun explained how Nivesh ended up at a psychiatry clinic.

According to latest reports, Nivesh had turned almost violent when the TV in the clinic showed ‘Bharat Nirman’ ad. He is being kept in ICU and doctors are trying to control the damage.

“I am a star performer for my company and have earned hefty incentives in last six months for the brokerage I have earned for them,” Raj Kapoor told Faking News when asked for his comments.