Culture | Faking News

Deoband fatwa to bring son-in-laws closer to mother-in-laws

“I may have to get a divorce now,” said Jamal, 35, “her parents live in Lucknow; we stay in Kanpur. It is 50.2 miles… No matter how many times I measure it, it’s still more than 48 miles.” Jamal had been avoiding visiting his sasuraal (in-laws’ place) ever since he got married, but under the new fatwa, he will be forced to accompany his wife to her parents’ house.

March 11, 2011 | Filed under Culture | Read More »

Khap Panchayat refuses to bar men from wearing skirts and saree

After issuing a ban on women wearing jeans, a UP Khap Panchayat has refused to pass a similar ban on men wearing women’s clothing. “There is just no reason for this ban,” said a Panchayat leader, “not that it would be unjustified and unconstitutional, but it doesn’t matter because nothing like this goes on here anyway, that would just be weird.” But Faking News decided to investigate the matter and found a shocking truth.

January 17, 2011 | Filed under Culture | Read More »

Madan wins special half marathon for touching Gul Panag

Madan Chandra Prasad, a 33-year-old resident of Delhi, won the half marathon for touching Bollywood actress Gul Panag, which was organized on the sidelines of Delhi Half Marathon yesterday. Madan achieved this frequent feat (of touching women) after running 1.69 kilometers in little over seven minutes. An estimated 3000 like-minded men were taking part in this special half marathon for touching Gul.

November 22, 2010 | Filed under Culture | Read More »

IIT Roorkee student caught holding test tube in an obscene manner

Public outrage has been growing after some newspapers published “revealing” pictures of some IIT students holding test tubes in an “obscene” manner in their laboratory. Even though students claim that what happened was a “normal” activity in a chemistry lab, protestors have been gathering outside the institution demanding strict action against the “vulgar” and “depraved” students.

October 31, 2010 | Filed under Culture | Read More »

Haryana man marries “female” chicken due to falling sex-ratio

The falling sex ratio has prompted a man from Haryana to take extreme measures. Faced with a shortage of women in his village, 28 years old, Rajan Dhanna found an unorthodox solution befitting of his rural community. Last week Rajan married Simi. Simi has been described as “fair, youthful, obedient and an excellent provider of food”. Simi also happens to be a chicken, a young hen.

October 28, 2010 | Filed under Culture | Read More »

Man learns to play new mobile game by peeping over shoulder of co-passenger

As soon as Rajesh cleared the sixth level of Treasure Towers, his spectacular performance was applauded by at least three co-passengers, who had been silently but absorbedly witnessing the game on his mobile screen, where it was being played and telecasted live and free-to-air in Delhi Metro. Even though his newly made fans wanted him to continue, Rajesh, 23, decided to call it quits.

October 23, 2010 | Filed under Culture | Read More »

Pervert shocked to know he had been feeling manboobs till now

Ranjeet Singh, a habitual eve-teaser and an utter pervert, got the shock of his life when he realized that he had been enjoying the fleshy feel of someone’s manboobs in a crowded Delhi bus. Ranjeet thought that a girl was standing behind him in the bus, a thought that led him instinctively to press his back on purpose against the body of the person standing behind him.

August 25, 2010 | Filed under Culture | Read More »

Khap Panchayat orders its own “Natha” to commit suicide

In yet another incidence involving Khap Panchayat’s tyranny, the panchayat of village Peemproli has ordered one villager Natha Khandelwal to commit suicide to help the village get the necessary publicity. A small village in Haryana, Peemproli is mostly inhabited by Brahmins and has not seen any development since independence. Inspired by the movie “Peepli Live”, the panchayat ordered that Natha should kill himself as it would bring the much needed media and political attention to the village.

August 20, 2010 | Filed under Culture | Read More »

Tensions run high as wife utters name of ex during love making

In a major relationship gaffe, Savita, 29, blurted out the name of her ex-boyfriend last night when she was in a passionate union with Rajan, 34, her husband for the last three years. This accidental but scandalous slip of tongue by the wife has reportedly put the relationship between the couple on the rocks even as the neighbors termed the situation as tense but under control.

August 16, 2010 | Filed under Culture | Read More »

Horrible looking co-passenger turns out to be distant relative

In a shocking revelation for 24-year-old Nirad Singh, the hideous looking middle-aged man traveling along with him in the same railway compartment turned out to be his distant relative, a finding that was chanced upon by Nirad once they started talking two hours after the journey began. Nirad was trying his best to deal with the difficult and embarrassing situation when reports last came in.

August 10, 2010 | Filed under Culture | Read More »