Friday, 28th February, 2020


Bulls no longer interested in taking part in rallies to protest petrol price hike

06, Nov 2011 By Pagal Patrakar

New Delhi. After being forced to take part in rallies to protest hike in petrol prices, bulls of India have requested human beings to keep them out of this bullshit. Opposition parties have often used bullock carts as a mean of protest to oppose fuel price hikes, where bulls have to bear random stuff going around them. The beefy bovines have now asked human beings to excuse them from any future involvement.

Bullock cart protest to oppose fuel price hike
A bull, completely disinterested and frustrated with frequent petrol price hikes and ensuing events.

“The whole experience is bloody irritating,” Bailesh Singh, the leader of newly formed LTBA (Leave The Bulls Alone) complained, “Every few weeks they take us out on the roads, yoke us to some cart, and put motorcycles and gas stoves on the cart. And then the worst happens; they start screaming and waving flags all around.”

Bailesh explained that initially even the bulls enjoyed such protests as it gave them an opportunity to come on national television, but soon they lost all interest.

“We waited for long, but even the India TV reporters didn’t ask our views on petrol price hike, even though we have been the most regular protestors,” Bailesh rued, “And we can air our views on inflation better than many of those protestors. Yet not a single bull was invited to any television studio discussion.”

But their desire to come on television was not the only factor, bulls clarified that they took part in the protests as the fuel price hike did impact them.

“Yes, we are afraid that bullock carts could be back in business and we could be forced to indulge in labor, which will leave very little time for us to indulge in our favorite pastimes – chewing cud and passing dung,” Bailesh expressed his deepest fears.

“But what do such protests achieve?” he asked, “The prices don’t come down; in fact, they are raised again. This is clearly a useless exercise and we are no longer interested in this bullshit.”

Bulls are confident that at least one M – Maneka Gandhi, Mamata Banerjee, or Manmohan Singh – will surely speak up about their problems.