Saturday, 22nd February, 2020


Contractor discovers water soluble tar that will remove roads between potholes

02, Aug 2011 By Pagalam Ritam

Mumbai. A road contractor cum amateur scientist from Mulund named Ram Gopal Brrrma has reportedly discovered a 100% water soluble tar for building roads. The breakthrough, which has the potential to change the roadmap of future India, also promises to resolve the recurrent pothole problems during the rainy season.

Mr. Brrrma fondly calls this project ‘Ram Gopal BrrrMaan Ki Road’. “My years of experiments with the Indian roads have finally bore fruits. I fill like running around my roads stark naked and shout EuRekha EuMadhuri EuSridevi”, said a euphoric Mr. Brrrma.

“The roads built with this tar will be completely washed off during monsoons; thereby eradicating the root cause of potholes – the roads. No roads, no potholes,” said Mr. Brrrma, “And that’s not all, since the road needs to be rebuilt every time, the citizens will get a fresh road each year and feel that the government is working round the year for them.”

“They might go slow on demand for a Lokpal as a result,” he announced, under thunderous applause from BMC officials and state leaders who were present at the press conference where the maverick scientist cum contractor revealed his invention.

The chemical reaction that led to the invention of 100% water soluble tar

Mr. Brrrma claims that the raw materials that were used in creating the tar are abundantly available in India: “If you observe the design equation closely you can see the Swadeshi thought process at work.”

The humble contractor dedicated his success to Roadies – a reality show on MTV that showcases youth power of India. “My passion for roads took me to Roadies audition. Even though I was kicked out, but the pothole free heads of the judges gave me the initial idea of pothole free roads,” he claimed.

“Just like completely bald head is better than a balding head with patches of hair, I realized that a completely concrete-less road would be better than roads with patches of concretes, which cause potholes to appear,” Mr. Brrrma explained the rationale to Faking News correspondent.

Roads in rains during BT (Before Tar) era (left), and once the AT (After Tar) era begins.

The state government has officially refused to comment about this, but presence of state leaders during Mr. Brrrma’s press conference confirmed that the leaders were quite excited about the immense economic opportunity that this invention promises.

“I wish the materials used in this tar were also used in making the Adarsh Housing Society building,” Congress leader Ashok Chavan said, “By now, the building would have been gone just like the files.”

The opposition has also clarified that they will not object unless the future roads were found incapable to hold a Rath, or a Nitin Gadkari, or a Nitin Gadkari in a Rath.

Only concern has come from a part of aam aadmi, mostly men, who are afraid that henceforth passing quick urine near the roadside might get riskier, for the urine water could remove a part of the road thus causing potholes to reappear.