Wednesday, 26th February, 2020


Escaped terrorist returns to Mumbai police for better life

21, Sep 2013 By idiot420

Mumbai. In a dramatic turn of events, Indian Mujahideen terrorist Afzal Usmani, who escaped from MCOCA court on Friday, came back to jail today after witnessing problems like inflation, traffic, and housing outside.

The bizarre incident has added further to the woes of an already embarrassed government, which is facing severe criticism over ailing economy.

A lot many other terrorists are planning to infiltrate in India and surrender, sources say.

After escaping from the police custody, Afzal reportedly took shelter in a suburb of Mumbai. Breathing in open air after 5 years of jail, happy Afzal was all set to start a new innings of life. But smile on his face was soon washed away when he went on to have kanda bhajia with five rupees in his pocket.

The bhajiawala apparently told Afzal, “jao baba jao, paanch rupaye mein kaanda sunghne dunga bas!” (for 5 rupees, all you can afford is the freedom to smell the onions, not bhajia)

Shocked, Afzal returned to his local friend, who told him not to worry. “You pay me 25000 rupees per month only and I will get you some food, and you can live here too,” his friend offered to share his 80 square feet room with no toilet.

At this point of time, Afzal realized that jail was better.

“I will be secured too. Who knows I’d be killed in a fake encounter by the government of Gujarat if I roam outside,” said Afzal, accused of 2008 Ahmedabad and Surat bomb blasts.

Convinced that jail was better deal, Afzal surrendered this morning. A relieved Mumbai police has issued a press release thanking the government for inflation and general hardships of life.

“We have decided to distribute monthly circulars to all prisoners that will contain current prices of items of daily use, so that they know how tough it is outside and don’t make any jailbreak attempts,” a Mumbai police spokesperson told Faking News.

Unconfirmed sources claim that this incident could soon be documented in the next installment of Bharat Nirman ads.