Kanpur. After months of deliberation, research, and analysis, the IIT Council has decided to include “Why MBA?” as a compulsory essay question in the JEE Advanced Exam.
Aspiring IITians will have to clear this question, which will have more weightage than the lesser relevant subjects like Physics, Chemistry, or Maths.
Justifying this decision, Prof. Arvind Swamy, the head of the examination committee said, “IIT engineers are among the
nerdiest brainiest creatures around and after their bachelors, most of them aim for MBA education to enter the world of consultancy and finance. However, we have seen quite a few of them not getting into MBA colleges since they can’t answer the ‘Why MBA?’ question in the Personal Interview round. In fact, their reaction to this question is similar to Suresh Raina’s against a short ball; bamboozled. Hence, we want to ensure that only the students with right focus enter the IITs.”
“The average percentage of IITians in MBA class of 2012 across India was 83.52%. However, in the class of 2013, it has fallen down to 79.91%. Such a steep drop cannot be taken lightly and we decided to address the matter before it becomes a problem out of hand like that show MTV Roadies has become for humanity,” added Swamy underlying the seriousness of the problem.
When Faking News contacted the government, the Minister of State for HRD Mr. Shashi Tharoor, who was on his way to inaugurate IIM Cherapunji, the 117th IIM, said, “The question will be juxtaposed in such a way to enhance the symbiotic relationship between engineering and management.”
(this reporters could not figure out what that quote meant, something that can be juxtaposed with his Verbal Ability percentile in CAT 2012).
While the government’s response ambiguous, the decision has found clear support among the student community.
“Right since I saw Yami Gautam in the movie Vicky Donor, I wanted to be a banker and had set my eyes on entering the IIT, as it is the pre-requisite for an MBA, which is a pre-requisite for a banking job. With this decision, I will have like minded-people around me and we can prepare for our MBA summer placement from the 1st year of engineering itself,” said Gaurav, trying to strum his guitar and sing Paani Da Rang in Himesh Reshammiya style.
Mr. Gharjode, who runs the popular matrimonial site www.shuddvivah.com also supported this step. “Over the years, we have seen that just having a BE/B.Tech degree is considered worse than being a Tushar Kapoor fan. An internal survey among all the female profile indicated that a guy with BE + MBA
sells like hot cake evince maximum interest. In fact, IIT + IIM is a big turn-on positive among the prospective brides these days.”
Amidst all this hoopla, Prof. Ponytail Chaudhary has announced that he is going to start engineering colleges to ensure steady inflow of
raw materials students in his MBA college (which provides maximum global exposure). He is even writing a book regarding this. The title of the book is “Lay Your Eggs Before Counting Your Chickens”.