Snippets

Man living in Gurugram using Shaheen Bagh as an excuse for not coming to his CP office since December

22, Jan 2020 By Sandeep Kadian

New Delhi: Unless you have been avoiding news channels like any sensible person should, you would know that there has been an ongoing protest against CAA in Shaheen Bagh for the past 5 weeks. While the protests haven’t affected the Government’s stand at all, it has affected the Delhi traffic a lot, which has gone from terrible to absolutely horrible. With this road blocked, thousands and thousands of people have been suffering due to the bottlenecks and traffic jams it has created. However, some ingenious people are taking full advantage of this blockade to skip office.

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Ajmer Singh (name changed to save his job), a resident of Sushant Lok in Gurugram, hasn’t been to his Connaught Place office for the past month and he has blamed the Shaheen Bagh protests for it. Ajmer has told his boss that he lives right where the protests are happening, and it is not possible for him to get out of there while the protests are going on.

When this Faking News reporter asked him why he is staying at home for weeks now, he disclosed the full story. Ajmer said, “I never disclosed my actual address to my boss because he keeps asking people to run office errands on their way home after work. So I always told him I am living in opposite direction to wherever he needs someone to go, he thinks I change houses quickly and that works for me. I did not know that this habit of getting out of office errands will one day help me stay out of office for weeks! Once the protests started, I told him I live in Shaheen Bagh and can’t step out, and he has been believing me.”

“I just said I can’t take my car out, and no Auto/bus will come here so there is no way to move. As a company policy, we are not allowed to join any protests at all so walking through the protesters to reach Metro station is out of the question since that would mean I joined the protesters, albeit briefly. Our company can’t risk getting an employee clicked in protests since they are expecting a major Government order so they told me I can stay home for as long as the protests are going on. This is the dream life, staying at home and getting paid”, he added.

Meanwhile, some Noida residents have come together to invest in a Hot Air Balloon to make their Noida-Delhi commute easier.