Navi Mumbai. The Navi Mumbai Auto Rickshaw Union today announced that henceforth all the auto rickshaws in the Navi Mumbai area will be 7 seaters. The decision was taken by the Auto Rickshaw Union, purely on public’s interest and partly on additional income, the spokesperson of the Union revealed.
“The body of a typical Mumbai Auto Rickshaw will continue to remain the same with an exterior extension of a Foot Plate on both the sides of the front seat. The newly enhanced models are to be available to the Navi Mumbai customers from the first of March, 2015. The Navi Mumbai climbers, well versed with 5 seater Autos, will be thrilled with the idea of a Foot Plate on an Auto,” the spokesperson spat the words out to Faking News while chewing a paan.
When a worried on-looker enquired about whether the new 7 seater would get into any legal trouble, the spokesperson chewed some more paan nonchalantly and shook his head left to right and back, a couple of times. “Negative. ‘Who will dare oppose us? The politicians are so much used to Seat-Sharing and they would like to see the strategy being applied in all walks of life for a common man. The police, on the other hand, so much used to making money by causing inconvenience to public, would welcome any additional money made by us (read: police and union)”
When Faking News got into the technical details of how an auto can be a 7 seater, what with two exterior foot plates and all, the spokesperson grinned, “Currently, the Navi Mumbai autos are 5 seaters. Are there 5 seats in an auto? No. Similarly, you will get used to the idea of a 7 seater. If you are getting technical, then call it a 5 seater and 2 stander.”
The 7 seater auto announcement immediately went viral on the social media with most of the college kids welcoming the idea. “Heroism in India is measured by how much your body is detached from the means of transportation that carries you; be it a train, bus or a motorcycle. Now, we get to display heroics in an auto as well. This is development in true terms,” a tweet from a college student read.
“The launch of a first 7 seater auto is going to be a spectacular event with 3 corporate celebrities in the backseat, 2 Bollywood celebrities seated side-by-side to the Auto driver and an RTO official hanging on one footplate and a Mumbai traffic police official hanging on the other footplate,” the spokesperson spat last of the paan out even as the Faking News correspondent looked for a famous Navi Mumbai 5 seater auto to reach the closest train station.