Friday, 28th February, 2020


No specific intelligence input was given about location of gold, ASI says

29, Oct 2013 By idiot420

Lucknow. Having failed to find any hidden treasure of gold reserves beneath the Unnao fort, ASI (Archeological Survey of India) has blamed the absence of any “specific intelligence” for this fiasco.

“We had only general inputs from Sadhu Shobhan Sarkar that gold could be there, but no specific intelligence input had come,” claimed ASI chief Babu Rajeev after the excavation was called off earlier today.

Unnao Fort
What lies beneath? Ghanta?

“Unnao fort is quite big and it’s not possible to dig every part of it. Sadhu baba should have been more specific in his inputs,” he reiterated.

As soon as the claim about “specific intelligence” was made, Bihar Chief Minister Nitish Kumar came out in support of ASI.

“You can’t blame ASI for all this. Sadhu Baba should have given exact GPS location of the bomb, I mean, gold. I’ve heard that Unnao Fort is as big as Gandhi Maidan of Patna, people should understand the challenges involved,” the Bihar CM underscored the need of specific intelligence.

Sadhu Shobhan Sarkar is obviously not happy with such comments questioning his intelligence.

“In knowledge fields like astrology, journalism, and counter terrorism intelligence, you can’t expect specific inputs and predictions. Such sectors have been running on generic knowledge and inputs for long. We are not data entry operators to provide specific inputs,” a representative of Shobhan Sarkar told Faking News.

The representative quickly clarified that Shobhan Sarkar was only upset with Nitish Kumar’s remarks and not with the ASI.

“Unlike the government, at least ASI did something after receiving an intelligence input, no matter how idiotic and vague that was,” the representative said.

It’s not yet clear if he was terming the actions of ASI or the intelligence inputs as idiotic and vague.

While everyone was talking about intelligence, Congress leader Digvijay Singh tweeted, “Appears that someone dug faster than the ASI from other side of the Earth and took away all the gold. Must be the NRI RSS supporters based in the USA.”