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Arnab calls up Duryodhan, demands an apology to the nation for insulting Draupadi

18, Jun 2016 By psych0bar0n

Hastinapur – In sensational news just coming in, Times Now hitman Arnab Goswami has called up Duryodhan, the eldest Kaurava and demanded a written apology for insulting Draupadi before a live audience.  The incident, coming in the wake of the Arnab-Ashok Kheny war has rattled the feathers of the Kauravas and sent Hastinapur in a tizzy.

Arnab ready to fight it out
Arnab ready to fight it out

According to sources, on Tuesday night, Duryodhan and his friend Karna were returning home from a party hosted by their buddy Ashwathama. Just as they had alighted at the Indraprastha metro station, Duryodhan’s cellphone rang.

“I thought it was my bro Dushasan calling me up to ask for my ATM pin like he always does, but suddenly I heard a horrendous 2000 decibel noise roaring into my eardrums ….’The nation wants to know, how dare you say Cheerharan karo iska‘… With the help of my Rapidex English to Hindi guide, I understood it was some fellow Arnab asking me to apologise to the entire Bharat for insulting Draupadi in the Hastinapur rajsabha. I tried explaining that Draupadi was actually my sister-in-law but he didn’t give me a chance to open my mouth,” mumbled a visibly shaken Duryodhan.

“His voice was louder and more powerful than my Brahmastra; when I turned on the speakerphone, the earth shook beneath our feet. I immediately realized that this guy Arnab is more powerful than the entire Kaurava army and I asked Duryodhana to apologise immediately,” narrated Karna.

There has been hectic activity in the Pandava and Kaurava camps after this incident with Yudhishthra asking Arnab to prove his self-righteousness by joining the Pandavas while Shakuni was seen offering Arnab a bribe if he fought for the Kauravas. “Ar-jun ka jawab hum Ar-nab se denge,” Shakuni told our reporter.

Meanwhile Hastinapur elders were seen trying to convince both warring groups about the futility of the war. “If Arnab Astra is used even once, the entire world will be destroyed,” cried Bhishma pitamah.

A humbled Duryodhan has been admitted to Indraprastha Apollo Hospitals in the ENT ward to fix his shattered eardrums. Undeterred by all this, Arnab was seen making calls to Ayodhya demanding Lakshman’s apology to the nation for giving Shoorpanakha a plastic surgery without her approval.