Thursday, 27th February, 2020


AAP tells its MLAs not to hang out too much with Congress MLAs

22, Dec 2013 By idiot420

New Delhi. Now that it’s almost clear that AAP is going to form government in Delhi with outside support of Congress, party supremo and most famous aam aadmi – Arvind Kejriwal has asked his MLAs to maintain a certain distance from Congress MLAs.

Kejriwal’s decision is being seen as a preemptive measure to prevent his novice, pure, and innocent aam MLAs from getting corrupted in the company of “bad guys”.

“Like a caring mother, who always warns her kid to stay away from bad kids in school, Kejriwal ji has given us some suggestions,” an AAP MLA confirmed.

Arvind Kejriwal
Kejriwal had told his MLAs not to take even a lift in cars of Congress MLAs while coming to assembly

“I want them to be a good neta. Coming five years is like college days for them, where they will meet all kinds of guys and girls. They have got admission on my merit, but there are many kids who are here in assembly on donation and management quota. Friendship with those spoiled brats is dangerous, as AAP MLAs may end up jobless by end of college,” Arvind Kejirwal explained.

AAP high command has handed over its MLAs a list of dos and don’ts, which they are expected to follow while interacting with Congress leaders.

Shaking hands, eating, and partying together are allowed, because these kinds of interactions spread love not corruption. However, talking about topics like Luxury cars (cars above Rs 15 lakhs), real estate properties (flats above 1BHK), Kalmadi saga, etc. is strictly prohibited, as it may provoke them to take wrong path.

“Discussion around topics like Alto, Nano, vegetable prices, Bigg Boss, home loans, constipation problems, etc. are encouraged,” disclosed a party leader.

In case any AAP MLA is found violating rules set by the high command, they will have to face serious actions like ‘kneel down’ or ‘murga punishment’ at Jantar Mantar. The final punishment will be decided through SMS poll.

Sources say that Congress MLAs are quite excited about the punishment part and may conspire to make AAP MLAs break the rules.

“They have already started sending flowers and party invitations to AAP leaders. It’s quite probable that after few pegs of drink, Congress leaders will make them talk about the prohibited topics and record everything on tape,” revealed a source, hinting of possible “fake” sting operations.

Sources tell Faking News that Congress is especially targeting Kumar Vishvas, even though he’s not an MLA.

On condition of anonymity, a local Congress leader said that party had given this responsibility of fixing Kumar Vishvas to their own poet Kapil Sibal.

Kaajal ki kothri mein ghuse aur bedaag baahar aa gaye, toh ye to kaajal ki badnaami ho jayegi,” a Congress leader explained their motive in Kumar Vishvas style.