New Delhi. Congress led UPA government has decided to set up a committee to investigate the issue of Narendra Modi having a 56-inch wide chest. According to Congress, Modi is distorting figures about his chest just like his Gujarat development figures.
“We cannot take him on a
chest face value. He is a master of distorting figures and creating hype through lies. The country should know the truth behind the chhappan inch chhaati, and if the claim is found false, Modi’s candidature should be cancelled,” Congress spokesperson Manish Tewari said.
Sources tell Faking News that once again, the government found it challenging to find a retired judge who was willing to head such a committee. After approaching fifty six judges, all of whom refused to head an inquiry, Congress decided to go for a committee headed by a retired tailor.
“One master and two tailors, all of them retired, will form the committee and bring the truth about Modi’s chest to the world,” Tewari announced.
“We will provide the honorable tailors the latest measuring tapes, sharp pencils, and notebooks. We will also provide them money for travel and stay; 56 lakhs rupees have been budgeted for it. The committee will present its final report in three months and an interim report after two weeks,” Tewari revealed.
Unconfirmed sources say that the appointment letter received by the senior tailor had “masterji, Modiji ki chhaati ek bilaang chhoti kar do” written on it, but both the government and the tailor, Lalji Darziwala, deny it.
“I have not been given any instructions. I will act independently and without prejudice or fear. I will find out the truth and prove that Modi’s chest is not 56 inch large,” the 66-year-old retired tailor announced.
While UPA allies have once again suggested that the government should avoid forming a committee when hardly a week was left before a new government takes over, Congress has decided to ignore such objections and go ahead.
“This is the vision of Rahul Gandhi ji who now wants to empower retired tailors,” a Congress leader explained why the party was resolute this time.
(based on a story tip though e-mail by Vilas Bade)