Monday, 6th April, 2020


After UP elections, nation might face an acute shortage of victims: Expert

13, Aug 2016 By manithan

Mumbai: According to an Expert, India might face acute shortage of victims after the Uttar Pradesh Assembly elections. Sudhakar Shetty, a self-proclaimed Expert on Victimhood, has uttered few words which had shocked the entire country which had seen a lot of victimhoods.

Speaking exclusively to Faking News, Sudhakar said, “Our country had seen a lot of victims in the past two years. Few of them are permanent victims, few of them are a temporary victim and some of them can never be a victim even if they suffer. But, after 2017, I fear that our country will face a deficit in victims.”

Pundits guess that Sheila Dikshit was made CM candidate with that idea
Pundits guess that Sheila Dikshit was made CM candidate with that idea

Taking a pause, the graduate who had visited Harvard University website several times and had delivered lectures outside tea shops near his home, continued, “Let me clear the air first. We are not worried about psychological and pathological victims. They are the ones who suffer from diseases or meet an accident and get admitted in the hospital.The victim that we are worried about is different from the victims currently in the hospital. Our victims are psychologically pathos and pathologically psychic. They were given more attention by the human rights activists and other such jobless groups only during 1999-2004 and after 2014. For the rest of years, they were victims but did not deserve much outrage.”

When pressed to reveal more about this shortage of victims, he finally agreed, “If you could see, mostly religious minorities and lower castes are the victims after 2014. Muslims were a victim ever since BJP was started. Christians were a victim whenever BJP comes to power. And non-upper-castes were victims in whichever state BJP rules. This victimhood does not apply to states where BJP is not ruling and to the whole of India when BJP is not in power.”

“During Delhi elections, Christians were made victims. During Bihar elections, Muslims were made victims. In the run up to Gujarat elections, lower castes are made victims. For UP elections too, combinations of all these are being used. At this rate, our nation might face an acute shortage of victims. At this rate, opposition parties will end up losing all potential candidates for victims. Maybe, they will have to end up playing victim card with Brahmins. See what damage Modi has done to our victimhood! Terrible times we are in,” Sudhakar wiped his tears.

Before leaving, Sudhakar winked and said, “I guess that, in 2019 election, Brahmins will be made victims and Rahul Gandhi will ride the winning wave because he is a Brahmin and he has been victimised by Modi and his Bhakts.”