London. According to our sources that provide regular information to Faking News, Prime Minister Narendra Modi had been to Baker street on Friday morning to hire famous detective Sherlock Holmes to help him in finding ‘Modi wave’ which he apparently lost recently.
We exclusively present you the highlights of the conversation that happened between Modi, Sherlock and Sherlock’s closest friend Dr Watson.
——– Below is the selected transcript, as it happened in 221B Baker Street (Sherlock’s residence) at 6:07 AM (local time) on Friday: ——–
Modi: Hello Sherlock, let me introduce my self, I am…
SH (Sherlock Holmes): Wait.. Wait.. Let me guess who you are. Based on your shoes and time on your watch, I reckon you came from India. In fact, it is North India, looking at your attire. And, as I could see a lot of people waiting for your autographs outside, you must be a popular figure in India. Oh yes, you are in politics! Politics and Popular… You must be none other than Nitish Kumar! Welcome Mr Kumar, How can I help you?
Modi: Grrrrrr!! (angrily)
Watson: Sherlock, It’s not Nitish, This is Mr Modi.
SH: Oh.. yes of course! Welcome Mr Modi. Let me guess why you are here. It is Cricket, isn’t it? You were involved in some cricket related scam, fighting with the BCCI, and some controversy related to a foreign travel too?
Watson: Sherlock.. No!! You got it wrong again. This is Narendra Modi, not Lalit Modi. He is India’s Prime Minister.
SH: Oh..yes of course. Welcome Mr Modi!
SH (murmuring in Watson’s ear): How did you know this (about Modi’s identity) Watson??
Watson (murmuring back): From Newspaper, besides, he has our appointment.
SH: Okay, Mr Modi, How can I help you?
Modi: Hmm.. I came here to report a lost property and I need your help in finding it.
SH: Oh, can you please explain in detail?
Modi: okay.. Mitron.. I used to have a property called ‘Modi Wave’ with me. I loved it. It gave me many benefits. But, I don’t know how, I lost it one day.
SH: ‘Modi Wave’.. Hmm interesting. Let me guess what this is. This must be the new unbearable disgusting ultrasonic sound wave on which Stephen Hawking is working on recently?
Modi: No! It is named after me. It is my charm.. my luck… my wave in elections. It is the reason why BJP got more than 280 seats in Indian General elections in 2014. I lost it recently.
SH: BJP, let me guess. This is a political party in India?
Watson: Ah.. finally, you got it right this time..
SH: And BJP is an acronym for? let me guess.. Bhakt Jan Parivaar?
Modi: Oh God! The articles in UK papers are showing the effect. You are a detective, don’t believe the media! BJP is ‘Bhakt Janata Party’.. oops.. sorry.. I mean it is ‘Bharatiya Janata Party’.
SH: Okay.. Mr Modi. May I know on what day you have exactly lost your ‘Modi wave’?
Modi: I don’t know. It was somewhere before Delhi elections..
SH: Do you have any suspects?
Modi: Yes, Kejriwal. it must be him!
SH: Hmm.. Kejriwal. I know this guy, we have received few other complaints as well. let me guess how this happened…
Watson: Sherlock, Please!!! Stop guessing, you are not doing it right anyway today. Please ask Mr Modi to continue.
SH: Okay Watson.. Mr Modi.. Please continue.. Why do you think. it is Kejriwal?
Modi: I used to have ‘Modi Wave’ in my pocket, till Varanasi election campaign during General Elections. Kejriwal was with me in that campaign fighting against me. I am sure he might have taken my wave and hiding under his muffler. He tweeted against BJP during Bihar elections too.
SH: Hmm.. That’s enough Mr Modi. We will start investigating what is under Kejriwal’s muffler and will get you back the ‘Modi wave’.
Watson: And the title of my new blog post is ‘The case of missing Modi wave’.
LK Advani (suddenly appearing out of nowhere): I too have written a blog post. Will you guys read it?
——– Modi disappears from the meeting suddenly followed by vanishing of Watson, before Sherlock Holmes could guess the reason of these sudden appearances and disappearances of people. ——–