Friday, 22nd March, 2019

Snippets

Secret Bihar Election Diary: Nitish Kumar writes as voting begins

12, Oct 2015 By Pagal Patrakar

Dear diary,

Voting has begun and now barely a month is left before I could become Chief Minister of Bihar for yet another time. Modi thought only he could become CM of a state one time after another, but now I will show him that he has a tough competitor.

But things have been going tough for me of late. First some Modi supporters showed chappal to me in a rally, then mike stopped working in another, and now the worst – Awadhesh Kushwaha, my minister was filmed accepting cash in a sting operation.

What kind of a fool gets caught on sting operation accepting cash after seeing what happened to Bangaru Laxman of BJP? I did not expect Kushwaha to be such a fool.

Maybe this is all due to that long association with BJP. My men have started behaving like them. My campaign strategies are also similar to what Modi used last year during general elections. This must have confused my people. I just hope they don’t start talking about Jungle-raj of Lalu or start talking about gau-mata!

Nitish Kumar's magic in Bihar elections?
Nitish is confident of doing magic again (cartoon by @NeelabhToons)

But despite these issues, I think I will become CM again. My gut feeling says so. My journalist friends say so. And even Arvind Kejriwal says so.

Kejriwal’s victory has given us hope that Modi can be defeated. Kejriwal’s men were also caught in sting operation before elections, but look, he won. He won because he said sorry and because he promised to half electricity bill.

I have already said sorry for making Manjhi the CM, but my problem is promising to half electricity bill. Many areas in Bihar are still to get electricity. You know diary, half of zero is still zero, so this arithmetic is not working for me.

But don’t worry diary, the caste arithmetic will work. Laluji is doing everything to make it work. He just has to keep some statements and Rahul Gandhi in control.

People ask me what if Laluji doesn’t let me work. What if it is his conspiracy to give me CM’s post and screw my next term with no development work, so that he can prove that I’m just as good as him? Is he trying to finish my political career and restart his and his family’s?

These questions scare me diary. But then I think – if I survived Manjhi, I can survive anything. If no development takes place, I can always blame Modi government. Let Laluji try to become Najeeb Jung, I will become Arvind Kejriwal.

Don’t worry diary, you will get a nice shelf in the Chief Minister’s Office. See you soon, first let me see what Modi is speaking in his rally.

Bye.