New Delhi. India is all set to see a new brand of politics, again. Realizing that their traits have helped lot many politicians strengthen their careers and prospects, vultures and crocodiles have declared their intention to enter active politics.
“I saw a man reading and tweeting about vultures on Twitter today,” Giddh Kumar, a young vulture from Hyderabad told Faking News, “I was shocked how come internet was talking about vultures instead of cats, and realized it was politics.”
Digging his curved beak into a pound of flesh that he had extracted after day long flying around a media van, Giddh Kumar further said, “Not only vultures, they kept talking about crocodiles – something about tears of the big reptile, and that’s when this idea of this pre-poll alliance came to my mind.”
Giddh Kumar has roped in Ghadiyal Singh, who hitherto had been working for a few politicians in Uttar Pradesh eating their enemies thrown in the private ponds, and together they have announced formation of Giddh Gadhiyal Party (GGP) that will fight elections all over India.
“Together we can reach areas that are under water, in air, and on land. Therefore no set of vote banks can escape us, as we can reach everywhere. We will be there – vulture will reach in no time when a tragedy strikes, while I will cry in support of the victim – for whoever needs us,” Ghadiyal explained the political strategy of GGP.
When asked how could they fight elections when it was limited to human beings, Ghadiyal clarified that he together with Giddh, and some other close friends, will only form the “high command”. The job of fighting will be left to the lesser humans, as is the accepted practice.
“We will soon start talent hunt among human beings to fight elections on the GGP symbol,” the crocodile said, “Through the media, I appeal to human beings to join GGP and learn it from the real gurus. You will be able to behave like real vultures and able to shed crocodile tears in style by joining us.”