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RBI to employ cheerleaders in BSE to bring cheers to the market

25, Jun 2012 By Pagal Patrakar

Mumbai. After the much awaited announcement by RBI to boost the Indian economy and falling rupee failed to cheer up the markets, RBI has decided to take the problem head on and employ cheerleaders in the stock markets to cheer up the market.

The last hope of the Indian economy

Sources claim that BCCI has been contacted by the central bank for resolving the supply side of the problem.

“They demand cheers, and we’d supply it,” RBI Governor D Subbarao declared in a party thrown to celebrate the ouster of bid farewell to Finance Minister Pranab Mukherjee.

“Traders and analysts will see beautiful cheerleaders in their offices from tomorrow onwards. This is the best we can do to bring cheers to the market,” Subbarao claimed.

“The ball is now in their court,” he said, rejecting any double entendre or TWHS.

Earlier, RBI has announced steps like increasing limit of foreign investments in government bonds and printing new photos of leaders on Indian rupees, but it failed to boost the economy, rupee, or the market.

Prior to taking these steps, RBI even tried doing nothing, but even that didn’t help.

“Bloody we tried everything and now this (appointing cheerleaders) was the only thing we could do. Now if this too fails to bring cheer to the market, I have got no fucking clue about what’s happening in the country,” RBI Governor candidly admitted.