New Delhi. A 24-year-old man named Mark (name changed at his behest) today missed a record 475 weddings by not logging into Facebook for a record 9 hours. The man, who wanted to prove to his parents that he was not a Facebook addict, had logged out for some time and ended up with this historical miss.
His miseries started as soon as he clicked the “logout” button. He started getting restless and sweating profusely within minutes. His parents became worried when he started to shiver and his eyes rolled back as he felt a strong dislike for his Facebookless life.
He was taken to a hospital, given oxygen supply, but nothing seemed to help. Finally doctors turned on blue lights inside the operation theatre to create a Facebook like atmosphere and Mark showed signs of recovery. He regained consciousness, after which the doctors immediately administered Facebook to him.
The moment he logged on again after a gap of 9 hours, he saw him home page flooded with notifications.
“Initially seeing 475 fresh notifications, I thought all my friendship requests to random girls have been accepted. It was only after clicking on it that I realized that they were marriage and engagement notifications,” recalled Mark.
“Every second minute somebody is getting married. No wonder Marriage is an institution with so many people dying to get an admission there,” Mark told Faking News.
“People are getting married at such a fast rate that had I remained logged out for a few more hours, I would have been directly subjected to the photos of their kids!” Mark added.
But parents are not complaining.
“We wanted our girl to get settled soon after completing her education and thought we would have a difficult time convincing her. But we were shocked when she said yes to the first offer without even looking at the boy’s photo,” parents of a girl wondered. Further investigations revealed that the girl was under pressure as all her friends had been getting married and updating their relationship status.
According to experts, getting married is the latest fad and has become a status symbol these days. There is tremendous social pressure among the youth to get married and update about it on Facebook. So much so that many old couples are remarrying so that they also get Facebook likes on their changed relationship statuses and wedding albums.
However Delhi Police has set up a commission to ensure these marriage notifications are not attention seeking exercises or hoax. As per sources, Police has already detained few people who were caught making fake profiles and getting themselves married to them.