Bangalore. City based teenager Nikhil Malhotra was rushed to the hospital after he was found unconscious on the toilet seat with his smartphone in one hand and water jet in another.
According to sources, he was following his morning chores while doing multi-tasking on phone when loud noise was heard outside. Nikhil’s parents rushed him to the hospital while he clutched on to his phone even while being unconscious.
Once Nikhil regained conscious, he blamed his condition squarely on his parents who had emotionally blackmailed him to join the Grand Malhotra Whatsapp group that comprised of 130+ members including 1st, 2nd and 3rd cousins, aunts, uncles, grandparents and even some 5 year old nephews. Nikhil suspects some of the members are not even related to him and probably are using same phone number as used by some of his relatives long back.
After receiving regular sermon on family values, Indian culture and excessive importance given by Nikhil to friends, Nikhil was still able to avoid joining the Grand Malhotra group. However, seeing recent data sharing advertisement focused around emotionally manipulating the father, Malhotra Sr. was inspired and threatened to reduce data and sms packs for Nikhil following which Nikhil became 138th member of the Grand Malhotra group.
The activity on the group was pretty light till 4 AM with occasional stale jokes from Twitter, expert comments about IPL with few baby pictures thrown in between which Nikhil dutifully commented “Awww” , “So Cute” while trying to guess the parent based on the phone number. Feeling happy about saving his data and sms packs, Nikhil went to sleep around 4-30. However when we found himself trying to open his eyes on the hot seat next morning, he almost had a nervous breakdown when he saw 4295 unread messages on the Grand Malhotra group.
All messages were flowers or babies with random quotes and good morning stuck for good measure. Fearing his battery backup, data consumed from his dad’s pack and general phone memory, he panicked. Being new to such over friendly Whatsapp groups, he forgot the simple action of Clear Conversation and made cardinal sin of trying to read through the Good Morning messages.
The gyan and motivation proved too much for his sleep deprived, in-motion state. He was amazed that some of his cousins who had hard time putting together single sentence without grammatical errors are sending such deep quotes about life, love, happiness and what not. He is pretty convinced he even saw messages tagged as “Nirdosh_Bapuji_Ko_Nyay_Mile” before fainting.
Last heard, Nikhil and his smartphone are on way to recovery and have been advised to stay away from mobile data for a few weeks.