Wednesday, 19th February, 2020


Onions looted from kitchen of Parliament’s canteen

13, Aug 2013 By Pagal Patrakar

New Delhi. In a sensational development, around 500 kilograms of onions have gone missing from Parliament’s canteen. The canteen management suspects that they have been looted because onion prices have been rising.

“We couldn’t find over a dozen sacks full of onions that were lying in our store when we started preparations for early lunch,” Ram Singh, the canteen’s manager confirmed, “For around two years now, we have been preparing early lunches as parliament gets adjourned by 11 AM and MPs insist that they want full meal before the next adjournment.”

The missing gems from the Parliament

Ram Singh further revealed that dozens of sacks full of onions were bought every week as kitchen stock because the consumption of food items was really high.

“Unlike what you see on TV during parliament debates, we get full attendance in the canteen. Nobody misses a single session here,” Singh claimed, “We have to cook for at least 500 people daily, and some of them even get lunches packed.”

However, the lunch prepared today had to be offered in Jain variety as onions went missing. The incident happened at a time when onion prices touched 100 rupees per kilogram. The canteen managers have filed an FIR and the police have arrested some employees working in the canteen.

While the police have only been questioning canteen workers, some MPs are reported to have opposed the presence of police force inside parliament premises citing privilege status.

“Canteen is an integral part of the parliament, and what happens there should be settled inside the parliament. And theft of 500 kgs of onions is no theft. Real theft runs into thousands of crores of rupees,” Beni Prasad Varma, an honorable MP argued.

Ram Singh refused to comment if he suspected MPs being involved in this loot of precious materials, but sources tell Faking News that the possibility can’t be ruled out.

“Nobody can enter or leave parliament premises without being checked, except the honorable MPs and some well known journalists,” a source told Faking News, “So it’s highly unlikely that canteen workers would steal the onions and escape with such a large cache.”

Kuchh bhi nahi chhodenge yeh log!” an aam aadmi commented when Faking News asked what he thought about the latest loot.

“Or maybe some of us got so frustrated that we took law into our hands?” the aam aadmi added as an afterthought.