New Delhi: The journey towards decriminalization of homosexuality, the repealing of Section 377 of the Indian Penal Code, has hit another road bump. But this time, it is neither a legal road bump nor political. It isn’t even about ‘our culture’ or ‘decency’.
Faking News uncovered documents that indicate that the Supreme Court has been humbly requested to hold off on any decisions or proceedings concerning Section 377. And the source of this plea: The Prime Minister’s Office.
Now before you run away screaming bloody murder about the PMO being homophobic or about this being a Congress conspiracy, the real reason for this plea is lighting.
That is correct; the letter from the PMO requested the Supreme Court to hold off decision on Section 377 until such time as violet and orange light bulbs are fixed at 7 Racecourse Road. A source in the PMO confirmed this development and said, “Presently, we have acquired and fixed indigo, blue, green, yellow and red bulbs to bathe 7RCR in the colors of the rainbow when the LGBTQI community gets some good news from the apex court.”
The source recalled the way the White House, in June 2015, had marked the US Supreme Court’s legalization of gay marriage with rainbow lighting.
“Yes, that (lighting up his own home) was something that our Prime Minister also wanted to do. And after hours of research and tests — conducted by a joint action committee comprising representatives from ISRO, TIFR, BARC and three IITs — we finally zeroed in on the best spot for the PM to stand and take a selfie to mark the historic moment,” he told Faking News proudly.
“Unfortunately, the unavailability of violet and orange light bulbs has created a problem for us… for now. We don’t presently have any intimation on when the bulbs will be arriving from the manufacturers,” the source added.
When we asked him why don’t they order them and have them shipped in from a different manufacturer, possibly from abroad, our PMO source got angry and told us, “Never, The Prime Minister is adamant that any bulb that is fixed on the walls of 7 RCR must have been Make-… I mean made in India.”
When we asked him how long will it take for the bulbs to arrive, he smiled and replied “Well, not very long. After all it is only a matter of passing the GST, bringing in manufacturing reform, digitizing organizations, creating jobs, ensuring that everything is compliant with the Ministry of Environment and Forests, and then finally, the bulbs can be manufactured and we can fix them.”
When we asked whether the entire LGBTQI community will have to wait another year, maybe more, we didn’t get any response and that was the end of this highly ‘enlightening’ interaction.