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New parliament building to be super tech-savvy, here are some exclusive details

03, Jan 2016 By Pratik Purohit

New Delhi: Recently, Lok Sabha speaker Sumitra Mahajan sent a letter to Urban Development ministry regarding construction of new building for the Indian Parliament. Although the need for a new building in letter was reported to be paucity of space and structural stress, our sources confirm that the plan is to have a high-tech building that solves some of the operational issues.

As per sources in the parliament staff, new parliament building will have the following features:

  1. To stop walkouts of any MP from parliament, there will be automatic door closing system. System will be fully automatic and nobody will have control over it. Experts feared that bribes could have been offered to open the door, hence the doors will close no matter who tries to walk out.
  2. When a MP votes in parliament, the new technology will automatically send SMS to people of his constituency. This will make people realize their mistake of not having voted during the elections. This may help improve voting percentage in next election.
  3. In order to improve attendance in the parliament, finger print based attendance machine will be installed in parliament. An MP will be asked to spend time with poor people in his or her constituency for a duration that he or she is absent during various sessions. This is expected to scare the MPs into attending the sessions. In case a MP is absent for entire session, he or she would be asked to actually work and spend entire fund on welfare of people. This system is expected to work better than salary cuts, experts tell Faking News.
  4. In order to improve harmony among rival MPs, a big house will be constructed along Yamuna River. There, all MPs will have to live together like participants in Bigg Boss (a popular TV show among celebrities) for one week before every session. This might make them feel that the parliament sessions are a welcome change.
  5. Finance ministry is planning to sell rights to cover ‘Bigg Boss of MPs’ to news channels to make parliament financially independent to some extent.
  6. There will be CCTV cameras to capture every moment of parliament and live telecast with audio on You Tube. YouTube has promised to make those clips viral where someone appears sleeping or watching porn on mobile.
  7. An intelligent camera system to identify MPs who will try to doze off. A water sprinkle system will be installed in table which will be activated whenever a MP will try to doze off.
  8. An intelligent audio processing system will identify MPs who will comment/disturb in between other MP is speaking. Identified MPs will get seat in sound proof glass chamber as punishment for remaining session.