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Exclusive transcript of talk between Manmohan Singh and Nawaz Sharif

26, Sep 2013 By Pagal Patrakar

New York, USA. After failing to understand what exactly do India and Pakistan talk, Faking News decided to hack into the meeting between the Indian and Pakistani Prime Ministers on the sidelines of UN meet here.

We found that both the Prime Ministers met with much warmth. The Pakistani Prime Minister tried to hug his Indian counterpart, but it seems that the Indian PM stepped back realizing that it led to war last time a Pak PM hugged his Indian counterpart.

It was all words from there on:

Nawaz Sharif (NS): Hello Dr. Singh! Nice to see you here in the USA. Let’s talk.

Manmohan Singh (MMS): Theek hai.

NS: First of all I’m really sorry about the terror attack in Jammu & Kashmir. I just heard about it while talking to the ISI chief. This is a conspiracy to stop our talks.

MMS: I know. But you should condemn the terror attack. It’s easy. I have tweeted condemning it. You should retweet it. You can click the ‘retweet’ button or add +1 to it while manually retweeting.

NS: Oh wow! But I am not on Twitter.

MMS: Why?

NS: Social media keeps on getting banned in Pakistan. So no point being there.

MMS: Oh wow! We also get suggestions to ban social media. So there were no riots, rumors, terrorist attacks, etc. when social media was banned?

NS: mazaaak mat karo yaar! As if you don’t know that terror strikes are almost routine in Pakistan.

MMS: Why don’t you stop them?

NS: I have no control over these guys.

MMS: Oh wow! So I am not the only Prime Minister who enjoys no control!

NS: mazaak mat karo yaar!

MMS: arey nahi, mazaak nahi kar raha. We seem to be in similar situations.

NS: Yes dude. Heard you also faced a coup back home. The last Army Chief General VK Singh tried to stage a coup like that Mushy did to me?

MMS: I don’t know about these things.

NS: Huh? What kind of Prime Minister are you?

MMS: Eh? As if you know everything. Tell me where is Dawood Ibrahim?

NS: I am not custodian of Dawood Ibrahim.

MMS: What the hell! Don’t troll me please.

NS: Theek hai.

MMS: haha.. you also said theek hai! What kind of Prime Minister are you?

NS: Huh?

MMS: Never mind. So what exactly do we talk here? You are not in control, I’m not in control. Our economies are in doldrums, we are not playing cricket, and war is not an option.

NS: Narendra Modi?

MMS: Huh?

NS: Let’s jointly condemn Narendra Modi, and everything will be forgotten.

MMS: I will have to ask madam if that’s a good idea.

NS: mazaak kar raha tha yaar!

MMS: Whattay troll! You should be on Twitter.

NS: Thanks. So what next?

MMS: I can send you a Twitter registration link.

NS: arey, not that. What else to talk?

MMS: Not much. But talks should continue.

NS: Absolutely, we will not allow terror strikes to derail this process.

The Prime Ministers then shook hands and posed for media persons. They will soon release a joint statement condemning the attacks and welcoming further talks.

Manmohan Singh and Nawaz Sharif
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