London, UK. The long standing demand for return of Kohinoor diamond to India may finally be fulfilled, and it is all thanks to the normal inefficiency of British Airways.
Queen Elizabeth has promised that she will return the diamond to India if Sachin Tendulkar publicly forgives British Airways, the flag carrier airline of the United Kingdom.
Sachin and British Airways (BA) fell out after BA didn’t confirm the ticket of one of Sachin Tendulkar’s relative and then misplaced the baggage as per their routine policy. However, unlike other passengers, Sachin Tendulkar didn’t accept this lying down and took to twitter to launch an attack on British Airways and even used #NeverOnBA hashtag.
To make matters worse, BA asked Sachin Tendulkar’s full name which enraged Sachin’s fans and followers who were still busy writing SACHIN RAMESH TENDULKAR on BA’s Facebook wall when reports last came in.
Sachin Tendulkar is widely acknowledged as the cricketing God and boasts more followers than many mainstream religions.
Speaking to Faking News, Queen Elizabeth said, “Well I am a God fearing person. I have to be, he is the only one saving me for so long. Now I hear that God is upset with British Airways, what if he starts disliking everything British? I can’t survive without God’s protection.”
“I am too old to care for this diamond now. Charles, after waiting for 60+ years, he will just be glad that he got the crown, with or without Kohinoor. I can return it to India but only if Sachin Tendulkar forgives British Airways and sings God save the Queen”, The Queen added.
Kohinoor diamond has been the subject of much attention over the years with demand for its return to India raising its head every few years like LK Advani’s PM aspirations but just like the latter, without much success.
Interestingly, Indian PM is already in London. When we asked Queen Elizabeth whether she will hand over the Kohinoor to Mr Modi, she said, ”Oh no. I want this to go back to India ASAP. Who knows when Mr Modi will touch base there?”
Meanwhile, a headline in a leading daily newspaper in India read “To protest rising intolerance, Queen Elizabeth wants to return Kohinoor diamond”